confession about depression part 2
by BluexPanic
Summary: h8 my love


_"u give my life purpose and without u, I serve no purpose thats why I'll make u happy everyday and everyway so I can just see ur smile, that makes me happy 4 awhile but when I feel use I feel abandoned abused that broke my heart,that i wish i died with a stroke. I'll try to keep my head up high but there's no point since we're all gonna die, when I c u, u make me laugh but I know that won't last, when I see people with happy with their lovers I get bothered and fall like feathers, im a bit under the weather but I'm fine no one cares I know I won't have a future because I get laughed at my culture, the way i look the people just judge a book by its cover people are asses and I want to punch them with some knuckle brasses, I say I'm fine but I'm not I have a noose and a chair that I just got, this is how I feel like a stomped on banana peel thrown away in a trash abonded, forgotten and dead, im just surrounded by the wrong time, place, and people as ur there shining bright like the moon and out of the blue while I'm a mess u love me confess u help me without a hesitation and there fixing the situation. I feel safe I feel happy but there is no one like this to save me from where I am. my heart has been ripped and shredded and its sounds dreaded. my happiness will only stay for a while so mabye ill feed myself to a crocodile, this is how my mind thinks it Is crazy as it blinks, death is something that is just blank. I am drenched in depression this is something that can't be fixed with a wrench as I confess I wish there was someone like me, I feel like shit I dont know if this is it. I wanna die and bcuz glory won't end up in my story my ending will be bad and I won't be glad so fuck it sometimes im mad at myself but I just bottle it up as I drink another cup I dont want ppl to feel the same pain as i do so I take it away from them and make it mines bcuz this is why I'm way to kind" I need someone crazy like me but I know there is nobody like this I help but never get help_.

i made a mistake and that one is trusting u and now my heart is broken I won't insert it like a fucking token I've been waiting for years and now I'm sitting with tears on my face. I know I get made fun of my race but I'm fine just the shit that makes me lose it as my confession goes away I have to wake up everyday to suffer from depression. looking at the mirror i saw destruction. as my brain trys to function it just remembers ur smile i try to forget but i know i will regret i try but it wont let so its shit its harmful for me to look at u sad bcuz u were the one I had but if ur happy with the person u love I guess I'm glad. im fucking pscykotic and it's iconic so fuck it.

I'm an error life is a dream to me just filled with terror. every morning I look in the mirror sad, tired and depressed and look like my face is compressed wake up everyday repeating everyday I cant take it every time I wake up everyday were all slowly dieing while we do shit that will only help us for a little time, then we die. its like im living in a fucking lie dreams of terror living in fear the end of me is near so fuck society it's messed up every way fuck the shit fags and those douche bags kill them with their own medicine and it will show them.

I'm already dead the world im living is just in my mind and all it keeps doing is pressing rewind so I'm living in a fucking lie it's making beleive this is my life but it already pasted I wish it wouldn't last bcuz im tired of this shit idk if it is all of us have a end I guess death won't remain as a friend so all of us have to say good bye while it was a good night

as the imaginary star are bright they start making light as we both fall and die from a great height

life is a trap and it full of crap I just wanna go back. even if I had immortality it will just be fatality for me bcuz the memorize I had of u will be haunting me

and will try to taunt me to kill myself so I can see u but there's no heaven or hell so I guess that is shit oh well so fell and collapse

while time relapse it will be dark and cold but u shine up my life up only for a second then ur gone and I just realized it was u all along my brain is messed up wrong while I ran for u but u keep going further away everyday so I couldn't give up everyday but its to late since this was destined to be my fate.

she was there with her smile it was blurry but she made me smile xd she was funny happy and cute she was bright and energetic she shined the brightest she made my darkness into light I felt like I wasn't afraid but it was just a dream no one is like that she was just a dream and nothing else it made me happy for a while but now I face reality while we race till death and smoking meth.

I love u more than my self but at the end I feel used and abused for the shit u done to me I help u then leave me im fine I feel like someone broke my spine so I guess ill drink some wine. I've been waiting for u for years and all I got is these tears. so fuck off why am I the one who is crying when u didn't love me at all. why did I took the fall.

she was special to me she made everything bad dissapear I knew she was the one but she fell in love with another man and that man was my best friend and if she was happy with him should I be? I feel empty inside I try to fill the holes of emptiness but nothing happens I try to stay happy for her but it won't last


End file.
